Better, Worse, Medicated or Unmedicated

I know a handful of people who also suffer from anxiety. I'm always surprised when someone tells me; it's hard to pick.

Some of the people I know live seemingly "normal" lives. I'm pleased for them and envious at the same time. It's not a negative gripping jealousy by any means; it's just something I'm always working towards and wish I were there already. On the other hand, I know people who, at present, are able to do less than me. I suspect they're happy for me and envious at the same time. It's a personal journey and we're all at different places. I've been both better and worse than I am now.

Of the people I know, some are medicated with anti-anxiety meds or anti-depressants on a daily basis while some take them sporadically, as needed. Others don't take any. I fall into the latter category. I'm not and never have been medicated. That's not a judgement, boast or lament; it's simply a fact.

The most recent help I sought used CBT and ACT rather than medication and no doctor has ever suggested it for me, although one wanted to give me anti-depressants for PMT once many years ago. I have to admit I love the idea of taking an anti-anxiety tablet when I'm overwhelmed by panic and have strongly considered asking the doctor. I haven't, however. First of all, if the doctor felt they were necessary she would have prescribed them. Second, I mostly feel that way when I'm going through a bad patch which means I'd be taking them often and they are highly addictive. I know people who only take them when they're travelling, for example. Unfortunately, my own anxiety is less specific than that so I wouldn't be able to limit them. That's my own story.

I also know people, however, who are so anxious they need one on a daily basis in order to be calm enough to function. They have tried CBT and/or ACT and it hasn't worked for them. As I wrote, it's a personal journey.

I'm really on here just to tell my own story. I thought it was important to qualify that by mentioning that everyone is different. We all have similarities that we can relate to and laugh about together but my story isn't anyone else's and I would hate it to be taken as such.